| Office: |
2120 Market St. (at Church)
San Francisco, CA 94114
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| Phone: |
(415) 408-3741
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| Profession: |
Marriage and Family Therapist
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| Services: |
How to Survive Toxic Parents
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| Practice Description: |
Were you constantly criticized as a child?
Were your parents' needs more important than your own?
Did your mother or father demand love and affection—but gave little in return?
Narcissistic. Borderline. Self-absorbed. Toxic. Call them what you will, wounded parents create wounded children. And these children grow up without the basics of warmth and kindness, safety and stability.
In order to survive, we adapt and bend to the needs of our all-powerful parents. If that means we learn to parent our parent, that’s what we do. If we have to develop antennae to read the emotional climate and quickly shift to the rapidly changing moods in a chaotic home, so be it.
Our young hope (and need) goes something like this: If I do and say the right thing, if I support this wobbly person, if I give enough long enough, then one day . . . one day . . . s/he will be strong enough to adequately take care of me.
But what if that day never arrives? We can spend our entire lives seeking what we never got from our parents. We may attract spouses who are carbon copies of our caregivers. Expecting criticism, we perceive others’ innocent remarks as attacking or devaluing. Or maybe we’re never satisfied with the amount of attention, approval and reassurance we get.
Are your parents still running your life? Are you still trying to please them—even if they’re deceased? Are you trying to figure out who you are and what you want out of life? Are your relationships scattered with minefields?
Therapy is a way to find answers and chart a new course. Set limits and teach others how to treat you. To resolve the past, create goals and move forward.
I do more than just listen and say, “Um huh,” or “How does that make you feel?” My approach is pragmatic and straightforward. We work together to set goals and stay on task. I offer suggestions and feedback. And I’ve been doing this work for thirty years.
On the right side of this screen, you'll see links to three articles which I wrote. They'll give you more information about me and how I work with clients.
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Practice Specialties or Interests:
(Strengths are
in bold text) |
Relationship Issues
Anxiety Disorders/Phobias
Gay/Lesbian Issues
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| Age Specialties: |
Adults
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| Session Formats: |
Individual
Couples
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| Treatment Approaches: |
Cognitive/Cognitive-Behavioral
Psychodynamic
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| Education: |
Masters
University of Tennessee
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| License #: |
MFC25896 |
| License State: |
California |
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Additional Information
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| Years in Practice: Over 20 |
| Gender: Male |
| Accepting New Clients: Yes |
| Sliding Fee Scale: Yes |
| Public Transportation: Yes |
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| Religious guilt holding you back? |
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| Workshop - How to Stop Procrastinating |
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